“People aren’t thinking about you the way that you’re thinking about you.” – Alexis Rose

Think of the person that you look up to, the person you want to be more like or the one that pushes you to be better. This can be more than one person or the same individual. I have a couple of people that fall into each of the above. I have only one that I place in all three.

There is one person that I have always looked up to, have always tried to be more like and have always pushed myself to be better for this person. This person is one of the strongest and smartest I know. We really are like peas and carrots. If you know me personally, you have probably guessed by now the person I am referencing. If not, I’ll clue you in a little later.

If you are a younger sibling you will understand what it is like growing up wanting to be around your sister/brother all of the time and do what they were doing. The older sibling is most always your first hero and is placed on a higher level than others simply by being born before you. I’m the little sister and this was always true for me. They hated being followed around and playing “little kid games”, it hurt our feelings, we cried, mom got mad, sis/bro is mad – dislikes you more, you go nap and try again later. Vicious cycle, until the crying doesn’t work and it turns into constant and I mean constant bickering. I am surprised the stairs never fell in at 502 (what we called our house) and that the doors did not fall off the hinges. STOMP STOMP STOMP all the way to the top and then.…..SLAMMMMM!! Whewww y’all, my poor daddy! As you and your siblings get older, things begin to change. Then one goes away to college and things really change. You actually miss them and now have to figure out who to trust at school if you have an emergency. They come home and tell you about the football games and friends. You turn sixteen and start spending any weekend you can with them in college. You start hanging out as friends. You break too many driving laws to get to them after a mishap with some soup. From the bickering, slamming door sisters to college/law school roommates to surviving life changing events to the present. My sister, who by now is a little bit annoyed – rolling her eyes at this exact moment – and a little bit curious where the hell I’m going with all this – has been the one filling all three of these for me. Likely since day one, but I’ll be a realist and say before that when she would sing and read to me in da’ belly.

My sister is a very private person and we actually talked about my willingness to open up on my blog recently. I admire her for that, and she is surprised by me. She is the type of person you would really like to hate because she is pretty close to perfect. I’v actually had this conversation with our friend, Crystal. Hear me out: southern, intelligent, sports knowledge, Bama fan, witty, good person, beauty inside and out. Most of all humble – these are all subjective, but fitting. She got the best of our grandmothers, grandfather, dad and mom. Literally the best of each of these makes into one amazing human. It’s close to impossible not to like her when you know her. I have literally had a front row seat to watch this person go from a weirdo with pouffy bangs to this beautiful, confident woman, and badass mom to boot. I say all of this because I realized recently I do not tell her. or any of the others that I look up to, enough how much I appreciate them and what they bring to my life.

My big sister really is the best. I’m lucky, but more than that? She is my best friend. (Cue cheesy movie moment, I know if mom is reading this she has tears right now – eye roll). We hang out and text more than we would ever admit, because it is downright embarrassing! But I don’t say, “You’re awesome ya know?” or “You rocked it today” or what I appreciate and admire about her or them to them enough. That is terrible of me and I am really ashamed. I know, better than a lot, how short life is and how we never know what will happen.

This does lead me to wonder, do these people know that I admire them? That to me they are on a pedestal and even why? I’m pretty sure all but 2, would be surprised. So why do they not know? Why have I not told them before now? I have no answer for that. I think it boils down to if the person would want to know or not know. If I want these individuals to know or not know.

I leave you with a challenge. Reach out to those that influence you and let them know they are in your thoughts, let them know how much you appreciate them or even send an anonymous happy! We all could use a little more love and positivity in our lives.

“Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty.”

Author: evyonke15

Wife. Dog mom. Rescue dog advocate. Sports enthusiast.

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